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“We’re all damaged in our own way. Nobody’s perfect. I think we’re all somewhat screwy. Every single one of us.” – Johnny Depp

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Dissociation: the facts

Last week has been a rollercoaster ride for everyone. And a couple of ambulance ones for me. I’ve dissociated the last Thursday and Friday nights. As if coming “free” of these times of dissociation and feeling totally out of it wasn’t enough, it’s working out my last steps for clues about what’s happened.

TW for the next little while… Read More

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“There is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself.” – Hannah Gadsby, Nanette

To do: live in the moment

I can’t get over this week. It’s been one hell of a week, and I’ve only been out of hospital 10 days. It’s been crazy busy. And so very exhausting, but I wouldn’t change it for the world, being at home is just wonderful (I wouldn’t mind changing the frequency of my dissociations, or the constant barrage of the voice, or the fact that I have to take my meds and feeds because that was a dependent factor of my discharge. It sucks, because doing both these things distress me so.)

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“Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself” – Coco Chanel

A bonsai called David

Yesterday, after 51 days, I was once again discharged from hospital- even though everyone was resigned to the fact I’m not at all ready for it (my mood hits the lowest lows these days and I’m still struggling with my eating disorder) they still all agreed I needed to be at home the present moment.

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‘I was interested in everything and committed to nothing.’ – Gregory David Roberts